Thinking Out Loud: Proving Grounds

Why do you want to prove them wrong?

 It probably is a universal human experience; being doubted that is. I'm sure you all have experienced someone not believing in you. Someone thinking you could not achieve or do whatever it is that you aspire to do. Someone who does not have any faith in you doing anything, in you amounting to anything. And usually they end it with a condescending laugh.

..and they point at you. POINT AT YOU DAMN IT!

The usual response to such situations? Why of course we want to prove them wrong! Prove 'em all doubters wrong and make them eat there words. We do what we can, focus our time and energy and skills to achieve and do whatever we are told we cannot do. Can't pass the exam? Oh sure I can. You won't get accepted in the varsity team? The hell I would be! You can't achieve your dreams of being a big shot blogger with a three story home and a personal air conditioned bus? You can bet I can!

We would do almost absolutely anything just to make sure we can one day achieve what they have deemed as impossible, and for us to shove it, implicitly or otherwise, it to their faces. All the while our inner selves are applauding ourselves for an excellent job.

Are you sensing a trend here?

But what if I tell you that i've been thinking about this the past few days (yes of course you've been, jeez) and I came up with something. Here me out here now. How about, instead of proving your doubters wrong, you instead prove your believers correct?

Now don't give me that face. I know it sounds like the exact same thing just viewed in a different light. But that exactly is what I was going for. A change in the way you view things could, and would, have a very significant difference. I'm also not saying that those two are mutually exclusive. Others might be saying right now "Well duh, ofcourse when you prove your doubters wrong, you are proving your believers correct at the same time. It ain't rocket science dude!", to which I respectfully disagree. There IS a difference. Let me expound on this.

You know I just have to put this in here somewhere.

I'd like to believe that doubters doubt (and alligators alligate... sorry) because they look at you at a negative light. You're weak, you're fragile, you're too small, you're too big, too skinny, too fat, too slow, too timid, too aggressive, and so on. Believers on the other hand, look at you and see positive things. You are strong, you are a leader, you are inspiring, you are tall enough, you have this and that skills, etc. But it isn't as black and white as we would like to think.

Say someone said you are weak. You proved them wrong. What did you accomplished? You showed them that you are NOT weak. But did you show them that you are strong? Not at all times does it mean that since you are not weak, you are strong. If I may do some analogy with mathematics here; Not just because you are not a negative number means that you are a positive number. There is zero, which is neither positive or negative. Likewise, that is how I view this situation; there is always a middle ground. You just proven that you are not weak, but you have yet to prove that you are strong.

See, that is why I now prefer to prove people that believed me that they are right in believing in me. It may look and feel like the difference is nothing but semantics, but for me the difference of what it implies is significant.

Someone said you're too ugly to be a model? Don't prove them wrong.
Someone said you're beautiful and can be a model? Prove them correct.

They say you're too short to be a basketball player? Don't prove them wrong.
They say you have a future in basketball because you are fast and smart? Prove them correct.

People say that government officials are corrupt? Don't prove those people wrong.
People say that government officials can still provide sincere public service? Prove these people correct.

You've been constantly turned down by the girls you like? Don't vow that one day their decision to turn you down would be proven wrong.
Instead, vow that one day, you'll prove that the decision of the girl that finally loves you back is correct.


Might as well as end this one with a Simpsons reference. Homer could easily want to prove Mr. Burns wrong, but instead, he looks at it in a different way. A visual reference would be in order:

Playing in the Background:

"If you show you are weak, you've accepted defeat."
-A Call To Arms, Urbandub

"Alam natin ang tama, bakit di natin ginagawa?"
-Dapat Tama, Gloc 9

"Marami ang namamatay sa maling akala."
-Maling Akala, Eraserheads


"Ang aking lihim na pakay, ay ang lahat ng ito'y gawing tunay."
-Love Team, Itchyworms